The Next Generation and a Lesson in Living

I have been babysitting my grandchildren after the loss of their grandpa – my partner grandparent – my daughter-in-law’s father.
My grandson is four years old and my granddaughter is one year old.
Today, during the funeral of my partner grandparent, I was caring for my beautiful little granddaughter. I fed her lunch – which she wolfed down in no time flat and then we had a play with a new toy. She is brilliant.
I took her to her room and changed her diaper – can’t have anything interfere with that two hour afternoon nap – you know – that time when the adult in charge can sit and actually hear the quiet , read a magazine article or watch a TV show!!!
In an hour, she was awake and complaining and sure enough, a full, dirty diaper was evident when I opened her bedroom door.
This was not enough of a nap – I knew she would be miserable if left to play and stay active – besides, she looked a little bit sleepy anyway…so I got a warm blanket and tucked it around her and around me. I laid her on my chest and put my trusty lazyboy in the recline position. She did not fuss, she did not complain at all. She cuddled into my chest and tried to get back to sleep – she actually reminded me of myself many a night at three o’clock when I want sleep but cannot seem to find it until I turn my brain off and feel totally secure.
She was comforted by me, by my presence. She was cosy and comfortable – you could see it in her face. She trusted me and, dare I say it?….I think she actually expressed her love for me in those eyes, in her expression.
We were there for another hour of nap time. We laid together as two women in this family who have a secure tie that will bind us forever. She breathed so peacefully, she squirmed a little once and a while and she kept touching my hand, my arm. my chin…are you still there grandma to protect me????

Yes, my love, I am still here.

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