At the two year mark of losing my life partner, I realized that – being two years younger than him – I was now older than he would ever be. He was 63 years and 7 months old when he died and I am now older than that by a few days. I am reminded of the “Ode of Remembrance” ………
They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old: Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn. At the going down of the sun and in the morning, We will remember them.
I am sorry, my dear, for outliving you. I do not feel deserving of this life I have at my disposal….
YES………
I smile, I laugh and I love to be with people again…..
I cook, I eat ( too much), and I share my table with family again……
I shop, I buy, and I give away pretty things and fun things to our grandkids and kids…….
I watch nature in my new home and its park-like setting. The deer visit at night to empty my bird feeders – small price to pay for such a wonderful sight….
OK, SO………
My life is progressing well, I guess, and it is building on itself to create a whole new “thing”…..
BUT …….My Love……. I still wish you could visit me for even two minutes to tell me how to get over you………
Merry Christmas………………