Turns out that my new life is a good idea. I look at other women who have been put in the position of widowhood and most of them, like me, have also moved to new homes. Most of them are also still single as well. Maybe they feel as though they have “done their time” and they need new experiences and new adventures.
I do not seek new anything – I seek escape. I look for chances to learn, to put my brain to the test every day.
I search for beauty in nature, in the art that I create, and in my friends and their stories.
I get up, once again now, with an alarm – at five in the morning to get my exercise routine worked into my day. I have breakfast with three of my grandkids every day and get them on the school bus at the end of my driveway. I go to meetings with retired teachers, Community in Bloom committee members, Legionnaires, quilt guilds and Quilts of Valour members. I love my life.
I have a sewing studio that blows me away whenever I am there. Windows on all sides to see my birds and the deer. I let the breezes blow through and enjoy the fresh air and the wonderful sounds of the world out there. My fireplace keeps me warm and adds life to the room somehow.
I don’t resent living without my best friend so much anymore – I guess I just don’t have time to think about stuff as much as I once did. He is still always with me one way or the other. He always will be.
I don’t worry about how other people feel about me at all. I am fair with everyone and I think positively about anyone who enters my world.
I have given up depending totally on my family for support – they are far away and they don’t owe me anything. They have all bolstered me during my brainless mourning times and they, I am sure, kept me alive when they didn’t even know it. I love my sons and their families, for sure, but I have learned that my world now has to be a part of the real world – my kids don’t owe me a life. They need to have their lives and I need to have mine. That took me four year to realize. Am I a slow learner? YES!
Go and meet me and my new business at TOTS32.com and enjoy my new venture. Yes, that is me.
Thanks for reading me. I hope this gives you hope too. The fact that I haven’t given in and given up on life amazes me every day in some way.
Enjoy your day!